Keene Equinox

Issue date: 5/8/08 Section: A & E

Media Credit: courtesy

When you really think about it, the blast-o-rama that is the summer movie season continues to be the single outlet during the year in which film studios actually give what the general audience wants. Lucky for you, the line up this season should sway you away from the waves. Big stars? Check. Risk-of-seizure-attack-action-sequences? Check. Comedy that is just as dangerous? Check. Guaranteed entertainment? Double check. If these flicks deliver as planned, you'll be picking your eyes off the ground before the credits even roll.


1. The Dark Knight
Without a shadow of a doubt, if any title this year can speak for itself, it's this one. For sheer finesse, "The Dark Knight" already looks like one of the sleekest and most mind-blowing summer movies ever released. Have you seen the trailer? Better question: have you seen the unsettling footage of the late Heath Ledger as the Joker? The actor's last completed role, mark my words, will be his greatest and it seems his portrayal - a scary, sadistic lunatic of a clown - is going to make even Jack Nicholson cower in fear. As a sequel to 2005's "Batman Begins," "Knight" is all about the upheaval of Gotham City and the emergence of Batman (a returning Christian Bale) as the savior to a world without the luxury of rules and wrought by the destructive, smeared smile of the Joker. At last, a superhero movie with the stakes higher than its own hype.
Release Date: July 18



2. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of

the Crystal Skull
At this point, nobody cares if "Skull" will be good or not. It's Indiana Jones, it's been 19 years since the last film and people love it when something gets resurrected that they forgot they missed so much, especially when that something is a runner-up to "Star Wars." The movie will be huge and no trailer or promotional bit will keep the hordes from marching to movie theatres everywhere. It's true that nobody knows what the film is about (it's better that way), why Shia LeBeouf's character (whoever he is) is named Mutt Williams and how Cate "the chameleon" Blanchett's Russian villain is going to ruff up our favorite archeologist. So forget what I'm telling you and go with your gut instinct and see the movie. Run, don't walk.
Release Date: May 22


3. Wall-E
It wouldn't surprise me in the slightest if the entire staff of Pixar animation studios turned out to be a secretive extraterrestrial race. I mean, they are without flaw. Human beings make mistakes and these guys don't. How do they continue to ramp up their résumés with one animated masterpiece after another? This one, by genius "Finding Nemo" director Andrew Stanton, is about the cutest robot the world of film has ever seen, Wall-E (Waste Allocation Load Lifter - Earth-Class) who, in the year 2700, is left to clean up mankind's mess while they populate the outer reaches of space. Wall-E finds love in the form of Eve, another robot who visits a deserted Earth. Nearly dialogue free (the two communicate exclusively by beeping), I'm melting inside already just by looking at the two-minute trailer.
Release Date: June 27

4. Tropic Thunder
2008 sees the dramatic return of Robert Downey Jr., and by September you won't remember him as Iron Man. To laugh factories everywhere he will be known as Kirk Lazarus, an Oscar-nominated actor who goes to surgical lengths to transform himself into an African American for his latest role. Don't worry, you heard that right. Picture that alongside Ben Stiller and Jack Black as fellow actors as they film a jungle-centric war movie that turns into chaos not found in any script. The three amigos, along with other members of the film crew, are to rely on their limited survival skills to escape capture from "the enemy." I have this feeling, this inescapable build-up of excitement, that the hard R-rated "Thunder" will be sweltering hot, in a bullet-right-out-of-the-barrel sort of way. Action comedies don't come this expansive.
Release Date: August 15


5. Iron Man
Critics, to my delight, actually love this movie. Really love it. Few would be familiar with one of the lesser known Marvel Comics superheroes, but Iron Man is about to get popularized. Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.) is a playboy weapons dealer who gets captured by Afghan terrorists and is asked to make a prototype missile for them. Instead, he builds a giant suit of armor that has all the nifty gadgets of a James Bond movie. Works for us. Standard fight scenes and special effects apply, and to be honest, it doesn't matter what make or model they come in. It has been said "Iron Man" welds a popcorn movie better than most. Here's hoping.
Date Released: May 2

6. Pineapple Express
The "Superbad" of this year has rolled in quicker than a clean cut joint. Judd Apatow ("The 40-Year-Old Virgin, "Knocked Up"), the 21st century savior of comedy, is the producer of this film about two friends (Seth Rogen and James Franco) who leave their revolutionary brand of pot, Pineapple Express, at the crime scene of a murder they just witnessed. Because the weed is so rare, the corrupt cop who committed the murder has traced the drugs back to them, resulting in the buddies being constantly on the run. Rogen has skill to make anything funny and Franco has dirtied himself up to play a burping loser. I'd go just to see the latter.
Release Date: August 8

7. The Incredible Hulk
Universal Studios is crossing their fingers in the hope that we've forgotten about the atrocity that was 2003's "Hulk." We didn't. They are also hoping that by employing a super-serious actor like Edward Norton as the green meany and restarting the franchise by making it not look like a video game and more like, well, something much better, that we'd want to give them a nice warm hug. We don't. Proof is in the pudding whether this will work, but it seems Norton (who wrote the screenplay) loves the inner struggle of the character and why he's so grumpy all the time. In Norton we trust.
Release Date: June 13

8. Speed Racer
Remember the Wachowski Bros., the duo responsible for that teeny tiny "Matrix" trilogy? Yeah, they're back (finally) with what looks to be the very incarnation of a robotic gumball machine. "Speed Racer" is a cotton candy colored, live action update of the 80s cartoon of the same name that was about a young kid who has a knack for racing at very, very fast speeds. Played by Emile Hirsch, Speed Racer is competing in The Crucible, a cross country rally where anything goes and nothing is what it seems. If you ever wanted to know what Mario Kart would look like if it were made into a movie, "Speed Racer" hits hammer to nail. Still, it's the Wachowski's, whether they attack you with "bullet time" or not.
Release Date: May 9

9. Get Smart
Spoofing spy movies is a "been there, done that" procedure. It helps that "Get Smart" is based on a 60s television show of the same name, and one that has a premise that fits like a glove for this generation. A spy agency is being hacked into by a terrorist organization and it is up to a bumbling idiot, Maxwell Smart, to foil their plot. Steve Carell is headlining, and the rest of the cast is rounded out by Anne Hathaway, Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, and Alan Arkin. I didn't think these four actors could sensibly be in the same movie, either. Think "The Naked Gun" meets "The Office" that punches "Austin Powers" in the mouth. It sounds like it should be pretty awesome.
Release Date: June 20

10. Hancock


Will Smith has proven two things in his career: he can slip into an Oscar nominated role anytime he wants and, just as easily, own the fourth of July weekend at the box office. The last one of these was "I-Robot," but we'll throw in "Men in Black" and "Independence Day" for kicks. Simply, Smith is the B-movie, A-list star king. In a mockery of superhero movies, he's the title role. Crazy effects, Smithian humor and fun, entertainment for everyone is promised. Audiences will be there to see if he can save the world with the best of them and still maintain his cool.
Release Date: July 2




Greg O'Neil is a freshman majoring in journalism. his views do not necessarily reflect those of The Equinox.

Page 1 of 1

Article Tools