'I felt like I had no one'

Three years ago, Erin Dallas was in Michigan preparing for one of the biggest field hockey games in her life. Now she's in New Hampshire preparing for what might happen next.

The standout junior on Keene State College's championship field hockey team has always been at the top of her sport, but it hasn't been an easy road to travel.

Dallas' skills were obvious very early on. After deciding to take up field hockey full time over soccer, another passion of hers, she made the varsity team at Keene High School. Dallas earned varsity honors faster than her older sister Nichole, a former All-American at KSC.

"If it wasn't for her, I wouldn't be where I am," said Dallas, citing her older sister as inspiration. "I was playing soccer and I wouldn't have switched if it wasn't for her."

Dallas knew how good she could be when she played pick-up games in ninth and tenth grade. Several KSC players would go, Dallas said, so she could see where she stacked up.

"Playing at that level I could tell who I was better than," she said.

It was obvious Dallas, a midfielder, was one of the best in the country when she made the under-21 field hockey national team her senior year. Her strong play caught the eye of scouts at the University of Michigan. Within no time, Dallas signed on the dotted line for a full scholarship to become a Wolverine.

Things just got better for Dallas. As a freshman, she led the Wolverines in total points scored and notched the game-winning goal in the Big Ten Championship. Nothing, it seemed, could hold her back.

But what goes up, must come down.

Masked behind her great season on the field, Dallas wasn't happy. Her teammates were only that: teammates, but not anything close to friends.

Dallas thinks it was jealously that doomed her at Michigan. When she arrived for her freshman year, she uprooted a senior from her spot in the starting lineup. From then on, her teammates wanted nothing to do with her. They would only hang out with her if it were a team activity.

"On the field it didn't affect me at all," Dallas said. "Off the field it affected me quite a lot because I felt like I had no one."

Her coach, Nancy Cox, did nothing about the problem. Dallas would go to Cox with her problems, but nothing would change. It became a miserable situation for Dallas especially since she made efforts to make the situation better, but no one else did.

With an optimistic outlook, Dallas decided to give her teammates a second chance. After her fall semester, she headed back to Michigan with a fresh mindset. She was determined to make things work with her teammates. On one of her first days back on campus she called her teammates and asked if they wanted to go out -- they told her they had work to do.

Dallas understood. But later that night her roommate, a pitcher for the softball team, received a call: it was Dallas' teammates. They wanted to go out with her -- but not Dallas.

That was the breaking point.

"I called my mom," Dallas said. "I was like, 'I can't do it. I'm coming home.'"

And just like that, it was over. She packed her bags and the next day she was back in her hometown of Marlow, N.H. No more scholarship, no more Michigan.

"It's in the past. Just get rid of it," she said. "It was crappy there. That's all I need to know."

Everything didn't restore to normal, though. Things changed when she went back to New Hampshire. Her relationship with her parents took the biggest hit with her decision to leave Michigan.

"My dad didn't really talk to me much," Dallas said. "He didn't agree with everything. He was very upset with me for giving up the full ride. My mom was upset, but she didn't show it as much."

Clifford Dallas, her father, was disappointed because he knew how good Erin was. He knew she was capable of being one of the best. Without Michigan, he thought, it wasn't going to be the same.

"The field hockey has kept her in focus," Clifford Dallas said. "I don't really think it's going to get her anywhere because she's not pulling her whole heart into it. She's playing down two levels as far as I'm concerned."

Erin persevered - she had to. That was her only option with her mind still focused on the future. She decided to work and later apply to the University of Connecticut for the fall semester. UConn was closer to home and she figured it might be a better atmosphere than Michigan.

But before she applied, her life changed forever. In late January, she received some unexpected news.

She was pregnant.

Dallas said she was on birth control when she got pregnant. Four-and-a-half months into the pregnancy she broke up with the father of her baby, her boyfriend at the time, in what she called an "easy" breakup.

"I walked in on him and another girl," Dallas said. "So it was very easy. Punched him and left."

Dallas endured the next four months and finally - on Labor Day of 2006, no less - Tateeahna was born, all five pounds, six ounces of her.

"They put Tateeahna on my chest and I just kind of felt weird because I was actually realizing, 'Oh my god, I have a baby,'" Dallas said. "I knew I had one, but actually holding her was great. It was a realization and opened my eyes."

Dallas was just 19 years old when she gave birth to Tateeahna, or Tia, as she is better known. The pregnancy wasn't planned and her friends and family certainly didn't welcome it. There were some people who felt the baby should be aborted.

"They were definitely shocked," Dallas said of her friends and family when they heard the news. "In the beginning there were a couple people that wanted me to have an abortion. But I don't believe in them … It was my mistake and I'm leaving with it, and I love her."

With Tia on her hip, Dallas was still determined to play the sport she loved.

"I knew I was definitely going back to school and I knew I definitely wanted to play field hockey," Dallas said. "I just wasn't sure if I could handle it."

It wasn't until her step-cousin's graduation party that Dallas figured out how to do everything she wanted. She knew UConn was out of the picture because she wanted her family's support in raising Tia. All it took was a little nudge from her future KSC coach, Amy Watson.

"I remember her coming up to me," Dallas said, "and saying, 'Here's the plan. You're going to go to Keene State. You're going to get the credits that you need to be considered a sophomore and you're going to play for us in the fall.' And that's what she said."

Just like that, Dallas suited up wearing the red, white and black instead of the more familiar yellow and blue of Michigan. After taking the fall semester off after delivering Tia in early September, Dallas enrolled at KSC for the spring semester. The spring semester combined with her one semester at Michigan allowed her to be eligible for the Owls' next field hockey season.

It wasn't an easy transition for Dallas, however. While she did go from a Div. I university to a Div. III college, she still had to adapt to the style of play. The biggest difference, though, was the most important one.

"It's completely different because I actually get along with my team," Dallas said.

Junior goalie Vikki Stoessel, who attended KHS with Dallas, said Dallas is still the same girl from high school.

"She's always been one of the most dedicated players," Stoessel said. "I think it's really inspiring that she can do so much and be able to stick with field hockey. It's really incredible someone can be so dedicated to the sport."

After her impressive freshman campaign at Michigan, Dallas continued her work on the turf at the Owl Athletic Complex. Dallas' record-breaking season (she notched 19 assists, a school record) helped lead the Owls to another LEC tournament championship. This season has been just as good for the Marlow, N.H., native as she currently leads her squad with 30 total points (10 goals, 10 assists).

The road has been bumpy for Dallas, but there is no question she's going end up exactly where she wants to.

"The way I look at it, no one is going to stop me from doing what I want to do," Dallas said. "Simple as that. I always believe that if you want to do something, or if you feel strongly enough about something, do it. It doesn't matter who wants to get in your way."